In 1933, an overwhelmed and frustrated woman named Frau sent a letter to psychologist Carl Jung, asking him “how to live.”
(She didn't have any Instagram influencers to shout motivational platitudes at her, I guess)
Jung replied:
“Your questions are unanswered, because you want to know how to live. We live as best we can.
… If you do the next and most necessary thing with conviction, you are still doing something meaningful and intended by fate.
He shared the key to life.
This is part of recovery communities like Alcoholics Anonymous.
It was even the title of a song by Disney's Frozen 2.
“The next right thing.”
Rereading this story got me thinking about how much my thoughts on success and progress have changed over the years.
“Success” redefined
I've been doing this Nerd Fitness stuff for over 15 years.
Millions of people visit the site each year, more than 50,000 customers have purchased products through NF, and our coaches have served more than 15,000 individual customers.
During this period, I changed my vision of “success” and “living well” a lot.
I believed that the only path to success required militant discipline following a specific plan. I never missed a workout and I was incredibly proud of it.
I didn't realize how much privileged and simple life I lived where I was 100% in control of my time.
(Apologies to all parents and guardians who have read my 25 year old perspective!).
Now that I'm 40 and I can see the kind of people we In fact With the help of Nerd Fitness, I changed my view of success and “living well” quite dramatically.
Success doesn't happen when we learn to do everything perfectly, but rather when we become better at staying afloat even when things go wrong.
In other words, being successful is learning to be inconsistent. Learn to be good enough for long enough.
And that means, when life seems chaotic, focusing on “the next right thing.”
Do the next right thing
A recent newsletter by author Oliver Burkeman explained how he chose to maintain a tiny bit of sanity in an overwhelming world.
This brought me to these sentences from author Eckert Tolle:
“What you call your “life” should more accurately be called your “life situation.” This is psychological time: past and future.
…Forget your life situation for a while and pay attention to your life.
Find the “narrow door that leads to life.” It's called the Now.
Limit your life to this moment. Your life situation may be full of problems – most life situations are – but find out if you have a problem right now. Not tomorrow or in ten minutes, but now.
Do you have a problem NOW?
When we think about what has already happened and panic about everything that could or should happen in the future…
It's easy to feel out of control and overwhelmed.
Which brings us back to that cliché solution: “the next right thing.”
It's a cliché only because it's true.
We can zoom in dramatically and focus on something that is still within our control. In certain situations, yes, there is a problem at the moment. And we can just focus on this one thing.
But in many other situations, it's often us worrying about all the problems that might arise, or problems beyond our control, that prevent us from taking action on the things we can actually control.
Burkeman continues:
As for telling myself that I only needed to do the next thing…you can always only do the next thing, and then the next, whether you like it or not.
It's actually a bit strange to call any of these techniques “narrowing your horizons,” as if they somehow imply an artificial limitation of yourself.
In reality, you are simply recognizing how limited you have always been.
We all know how easy it is for us to overcomplicate things.
And when the world feels like a dumpster fire, it can help to focus on the next decision, the smallest goal, and do the next right thing.
This might involve a workout or a walk, focusing on the next meal, calling our therapist or finally say no to a commitment.
If “now” is the only time there is, then “the next right thing” is the only thing we can actually do.
I'm going to do the next good thing for me: take a walk.
-Steve
PS: Maria Popova an excellent article on “the next right thing” regarding his life as a writer which inspired this piece.
PP: Nerd Fitness is hiring a few remote, part-time humans (especially with flexible nights and weekends) to answer scheduled inbound calls from potential clients interested in our one-on-one coaching. Click here to learn more.
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#important #skill #staying #healthy